Preparing for a change of lifestyle
29 May 2007 | Val Shepherd, an older person who has lived in a care home for the past 17 yearsHaving decided to live in a residential home and arranged which of my treasured lifetime possessions to take with me, I knew it was up to me to adjust to this great change in my lifestyle.
There was naturally some apprehension. However, my lasting impression of my move to the care home is one of extraordinary relief.
I feel relief at knowing help is at hand day and night, relief that I need not feel alone, relief at no more waiting at bus stops in the rain, relief that my family are assured that I am safe and cared for.
The warm, friendly and welcoming atmosphere created by the staff and residents comforted me during what, hopefully, will be my last move.
Mealtimes here are a means of socialising, and a choice of menu encourages us to think about our individual needs. All diets are catered for, and it is very pleasant to be able to discuss any dietary needs with the cook. I appreciate the sight of the heavily laden fruit bowl, which is refilled daily, and of the day’s menu, which is written on the notice board.
The staff have to cope with many demands. Getting on well with all of them, from the essential humble cleaners to the managers, helps to make a happy home – we try and make allowances when our ideas of priorities are at odds. The staff are trained and experienced, and little goes unnoticed. Their job is to help, and we only have to ask.
In our home there is a gallery of photographs of staff and residents taking part in various activities. Our names are important to us, and this is one way of learning them. A smile from a new acquaintance is reassuring.
There are not many opportunities for one-to-one talks with the staff members, but we do appreciate having the opportunity to do this when having an assisted bath, before being enveloped in a huge warm towel and helped into clean clothing. Another bonus of living in this home is that we are near a university and student volunteers call in to see us – this makes living here so much more pleasant.
Money matters are a concern for everybody. I was widowed when my children were 5 and 8, and I retired on grounds of ill health from local government in 1979 so my superannuation was miniscule. In 1985 I sold my bungalow for £23,000, which I believed was a lot of money. There will be many people in similar circumstances and I suggest they seek advice from the Citizens Advice Bureau, Age Concern or Help the Aged. Never struggle on unaided. There is always someone to ask.
I’d recommend discussing any worries with your Head of Home or Manager – a problem shared is a problem halved. I hope you are as happy as I have been in my care home – enjoy!
June 6th, 2007 at 12:35 pm
Working with older people for over 17 years I have often heard people say they never want to go into care. Reading this account by this lady proves that whilst it is not something we thought we would ever consider sometimes it is just the right choice. I have seen many people lonely and depressed in their own homes unable to go out easily to feel part of the outside world. This lady has taken her time and obviously found the right place for her and as she said it has brough relief not despair. The problem is finding the right place and perhaps we all need to start looking long before we need it.